Life In A Labyrinth
Not going to lie. I finished reading Looking For Alaska by John Green yesterday, most amazing book and it posed a really topical question that I couldn’t stop thinking about.
“How would - you personally - ever get out of this labyrinth of suffering?”
Good question hey? I will break down my answer for you. This may take a while and get a bit boring.
Step 1 - Source Your Suffering
What are you suffering from? Maybe some it is more severe than others. Now in Alaska’s case (in the book) she was suffering from the fear of failing people. And this lead to her death accidental or not (sorry for any spoilers). But there is a lot of surrounding factors that lead up to the point of acting on your suffering. I personally suffer from the fear of not being accepted.
Step 2 - Break Down Your Suffering
What is causing you to suffer? Is it regret? Fear? Guilt? What ever it maybe you need to acknowledge that ( 1 ) the suffering is there and ( 2 ) why it is there. So let us keep using Alaska’s and my own cases to compare. Now Alaska had her suffering because she regretted not calling 911 with her mum lying on the ground dying. Even though she tried to give CPR she didn’t do the one thing that might have saved her. And in the end she succumbs to her fear because she had failed her mum by forgetting the anniversary of her death. This lead to drink driving and her future death. In my case it is because of being bullied. I was bullied from a young age always the outsider never included. I try to hard to fit in both in friendships and in relationships and this is because I don’t want to fail anyone.
Step 3 - Isolate Your Suffering
How can you stop the suffering? If it is possible is there anyway you can try and stop or reduce the suffering. For some people it is to hard to overcome but for some it is easy. All you have to do is plan a way of reducing your exposure to what is making you suffer. In Alaska’s case she couldn’t minimize her exposure because it was her mum and she could of saved her which in the end made her suffering boil over. But in my case it is easy but I still struggle. What I have to do is accept that not everyone will like me, and those that don’t to just forget about them and move on, or I try not to follow certain groups so I don’t run into people that will dislike me.
Step 4 - Acknowledge Your Suffering
Don’t hide it. It is hard not to. It is sometimes embarrassing to let people know. I never did when I was struggling. But you need to make yourself aware that something is wrong and that you need to figure it all out. Keeping everything bottled up and to your self can lead to things such as depression, anxiety and all that type of stuff so just be aware that not acknowledging it may have a long term effect. With Alaska, she knew something was there and chose not to tell anyone, she let her guilt get to her and reacted on it. In my case I bottle up everything, I now struggle with anxiety, I have quite severe and sometimes frequent attacks. But there are people out there worse off than me.
Step 5 - Escape Your Labyrinth
It is your choice how you escape but if you follow the steps above you maybe able to tell your story one day. Unlike Alaska, who’s story ended straight and fast. I am still trying to get out of mine but I can feel I am getting closer to the exit.
Just remember that if you escape your labyrinth be proud and offer support to others. I would just like to take this moment to acknowledge all those that have been unable to escape their labyrinth and ended their lives in suffering. You fought strong and hard and I believe that some of your may have had a suffering that was to hard to deal with. But never-the-less let your memories live on in your loved ones and let their be peace in the life you live now.